While many newly divorced parents are relieved to be out of an unhappy (and sometimes abusive) marriage, single parenting brings with it new sources of stress, often leading to disastrous consequences for the children. Typical problems associated with single parenting include but are not limited to the following:
- loss in income and attendant need to work (if previously staying at home)
- greater need for day care and less time with the children;
- a need to play both mother’s and father’s roles;
- household disorganization and unpredictability caused by less available time and more stress;
- few breaks from parenting or “time outs”, and less involvement in community life;
- a need to deal with the children’s reactions (often rejection) of a single parent’s new lover(s) or marriage partner (and perhaps his or her children, as well);
- a loss in the quality of parenting.
The stresses brought on by single parenting are very real and can lead to depression in many parents. This, in turn, has dire consequences for the children. Furthermore, half of all abusive punishment in America today is committed by single parenting parents. This statistic should give us all reason to be concerned about what single parenting parents must cope with and to find means to ease these sources of stress.
If you are a single parenting parent and any of these issues mentioned in this blog are occurring then consider seeking out the advice of mental health professionals. Child and family therapists can greatly assist parents in dealing with child management problems. Take advantage of their expertise. If money is a concern, check your health insurance policy or contact a community mental health agency for low cost services.
Single Parenting: What To Do
Positive single parenting is related to the level of emotional support received from the other parent and agreement between the parents on child-rearing matters. Thus, the parents need to set aside their personal problems, disagreements and anger so that they can calmly discuss matters related to the children. It is important that there be as much consistency as possible between the two homes on what is expected of the children.
Further, parents must avoid the temptation to “put down” or say negative things about the other parent in front of the children, or to otherwise suggest disapproval of the children’s continuing close relationship with the other parent.
Your specific situation may be somewhat different from the norm; please call, 734.927.9782, the Canton Michigan Divorce Lawyers and Canton Michigan Family Law Attorneys at Stelmock Law Firm, PC to discuss your matter. We represent clients in the Metro Detroit area (Canton, Plymouth, Northville, Livonia, Westland, Ann Arbor, Novi) and throughout Wayne, Washtenaw, Oakland, and Livingston counties. The firm’s office is located at 8556 N. Canton Center Road, Canton, Michigan 48187
By: Robert J. Stelmock, Attorney, GAL, Parenting Coordinator & Mediator at Stelmock Law Firm, PC